Everyone Leaves Eventually

Everything is temporary but everything doesn't have to be and that's messed up.

"come quickly - i am tasting the stars"

I'm smiling.
I've been smiling since a few days ago when
I saw the way you saw things and you created carbonation bubbles in my blood
Tickling my veins as they pop, making my heart feel like the central organ of
A soda machine.

I'm laughing at more than one thing.
I'm laughing at your face during the movie today
And the idea that you might pick me, the loser
And that way that you laugh at me and the way that you get competitive about the weirdest things like uno and the color or non-color that is white.

And I'm quickly falling in love because you aren't your dad
You aren't even close

But yet you are disciplined and kind
You are tall like your dad, but you're a good height for me
You are all golden

And I've never felt this way before
Never thought about that girl like I think about you
Never considered things about her I've considered about you
I'm quickly falling for you like champagne into a glass

"come quickly - i am tasting the stars"

Oh My Stars

I shouldn't have held you the way I did.

My stomach flips every time I think about your fingers laced through mine;

And I know I said it wasn't like that and you're like my sister,

But maybe I shouldn't have said that either.

Because I can't stop thinking about the warmth of you, how it felt to fall asleep in your embrace instead of alone like I have been my whole life, how it feels like my heart beats inside my throat right now typing because I've still never been kissed but now I've been held.

And I was held by you.

The Satellite

It's amazing how much I notice in a few days.

How laughing with you feels clear.

How you look at me. You look at me like you think I'm cute.

I noticed that you like to push buttons --but I'm too human to have any buttons.

I noticed your hair. It's curly if you let it be. You often don't.

You have thin lips and eyes that are too blue to be allowed, you know? You have high cheekbones and dimples that, whoa. Your face is the sky, your smile the sun, your dimples the moon, your freckles the stars.

You make a mean cinnamon roll. You hate one of my good friends but he deserves that. I just don't hate anyone.

You make yourself heard. I love it.

I notice.

Aw.

I've been thinking about you.

I mean, I see you most every day, but I didn't really see you until very recently.

And I apologize because I really like what I see now.

You're beautiful.

But it's not that, it's something else.

It's the smile when you're uncomfortable. How you don't shut down, you just laugh. You fail. You fall. You trip and scrape yourself. You hurt. But you don't let it destroy you. You get up. You try again. And most of all you laugh.

It's how you blush but you don't collapse. You're so unexpectedly strong.

And when I see you, my heart smiles.

I FEEL LIKE A LOSER SOMETIMES

I'm not sure where to go with all these thoughts.

If I could choose what I was, I might choose someone who isn't me, and that bothers me.

But I just feel like a loser sometimes, you feel?

It's Been 3 Days

It's been 3 days. She told me I wasn't worth it to her.

On the third day, I rise.

This is the third day since I was told, not for the first time, that I'm not attractive, not smart, not enough to be loved.

But on the third day I rise.

I rise to real life.

I may not wear a ten carat smile or drive the car that all the girls want to be seen in the passenger seat of.

I may spend my days writing about things I don't understand rather than getting yoked.

But Aidan James Coral is a believer.

He believes in love even though he's never been loved by any girl before

He believes in God even though he's never spoken to God face-to-face

He believes in the power of words even though he may not be eloquent

In the power of sound that she never understood

In the power of knowing what you want and who you are

In the power of two hearts beating at the same time

And most of all, most importantly, Aidan James Coral believes in himself.

This is what I rise to on the third day.

This is triumph over death.